Ever have those days where you know you are in a bad mood? Where every little sound or movement drives you crazy? Where you don’t know who you are, what you want, and where you are going in life?
Yup, today was one of those days. People in my office were bothering me, a friend was struggling, and I was feeling nostalgic, reliving old feelings, thoughts, and desires, and just allowing the feelings to eat me up. I tried so hard to snap myself out of it, I tried so hard to meet other people where they were at in their mood and it just wasn’t happening.
Days like today I can honor where I am mentally, knowing what’s causing it, and knowing it won’t last forever. Previously I wouldn’t even be able to acknowledge or consider fighting the feelings, but now I am able to both acknowledge and fight, as hard as it is, against my natural desire to withdraw. It takes such mental focus to try to force yourself to speak; force yourself to just be regardless of how your thoughts are making you feel.
I rolled with it. Naturally I forgot about being in a mood. I had allowed myself to feel what I felt, and allowed the day to unravel as it did.
Do you ever get to a place where you are so comfortable with a mood you almost like being there because it’s safe? Yup, I get it but the fluidity in and out can be pretty cool too!